Remember Secession! Texas Style

The Fort Worth Star-Telegram doesn’t like the idea of Texas secession.

At least Bud Kennedy at the FWST doesn’t like the idea of Texas secession.

Why? Because Bud thinks secession is illegal and led by “bubbas.”

In a piece titled “Remember the Alamo!– but forget secession,” Bud the legal scholar/historian lets his readers know that Texas can’t leave the Union.

This after titling his piece after a slogan used to defend Texas independence from Mexico in 1836.

Let that stupidity sink in.

Bud shows everyone how smart he is by arguing that the Articles of Confederation created a “perpetual union” and the Constitution strengthened that union.

Except the founding generation certainly thought secession was not only possible but legal from the Articles of Confederation. They talked about it openly during the debates over the ratification of the Constitution.

And Bud our burger eating opinion writer doesn’t understand that all contracts are “perpetual” unless given a specific end date by the agreeing parties. The Union was perpetual until some States wanted out, and many in New England did as early as 1794.

To make matters worse for our erudite lifelong opinion writer, he puts down a Texas legislator for owning an Ace Hardware store.

You see, writing stupid crap like his piece on secession is more important for Texas than providing jobs and supplies for the people of a Texas community. One does something tangible. The other could, too, I guess, if we could still use Bud’s columns for toilet paper or starting a fire.

Either way, Bud can’t stand that a Texan wants out of the Union. How dare he? What about our pensions! What about our postal service! What about airline flights! I guess Bud doesn’t think that airplanes could fly to an independent Texas or that Texas could outfit its own military and postal service along with whatever government programs it wanted to create.

Nope. Those things only come from Uncle Sam. And how’s he doing with that job?

Bud also thinks the founding generation wrote the Pledge of Allegiance. You see, our Texas secessionist rep likes the idea of the Declaration but not the pledge, so Bud puts the two together as an attack on the sesesh’s bona fides.

Bud probably doesn’t know that a socialist minister from New England wrote the pledge in the late nineteenth century. The founding generation never would have concocted such drivel.

But maybe Bud would be happy clicking his heels and giving a “Roman Salute” to the flag like kids used to do long ago, that is until Hitler co-opted that move and King Franklin told Americans to simply put their hands over their heart.

So nice.

Bud also thinks Mr. Ace Hardware is un-American for advocating secession. You see, this evil man wants to save America, but Bud thinks its ironic that he would want to leave. You can’t love it if you want out.

Kind of like the British couldn’t understand how some American hicks wanted to save their English liberties by getting out of the Empire in 1776.

Hey Bud, God Save the Queen! Would you like some tea and crumpets? Or better yet, if secession was so bad and illegal, why don’t you phone the Mexican government and inquire about Mexican citizenship. Viva el presidente!

Bud’s right that secession probably won’t happen in our lifetime, but that’s not because he knows anything about it.

Most Americans are too hooked on greenbacks to get out. They’ve been bought off.

The only question is, will this strategy still work when it costs $1 million to buy one of Bud’s favorite burgers?

I discuss Bud and his idiotic column in Episode 424 of The Brion McClanahan Show.